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Things I’m Loving, Reading, Watching or Doing
Landmine Tool
The landmine might be one of the most versatile tools in the gym. It’s easy on the shoulders, lets you move in multiple planes, and gives you dozens of ways to build strength, power, and balance. I posted four of my favorite moves on Instagram this week. Check them out here.
Lincoln in the Bardo, by George Saunders
I loved this one. Another winner from our Dad Book Club. It takes a few chapters to settle into the unconventional writing style, but once it clicks, it’s fantastic. It’s funny, moving, and forces you to wrestle with some big questions about love, loss, and the impermanence of life. I’ve heard his short stories are even better, so Tenth of December is now on the list.
The Rise of Kid Fitness Influencers
As a dad whose five kids practically grew up in a gym, I have some not-so-mixed feelings about the rise of kid fitness influencers. This article is fascinating. I love that more kids are discovering the confidence, mood benefits, and lifelong health that can come from exercise. But we also tread into dangerous territory when adult-like pressures around appearance, performance, and social media validation start showing up before kids are even teenagers. Likes are a lousy thing to build your identity around at any age.
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Quotes Worth Pondering
“The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of his time each day.”
— Orlando Aloysius Battista
“Too often we give children answers to remember rather than problems to solve.”
— Roger Lewin
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Big Dad Idea
Health, Parenting, or Personal Growth
The Better Yes
When our kids were little, my wife and I tried very hard to live by the rule: never say no.
“Can you read to me?”
“Can we watch this show together?”
“Can we play soccer right now?”
No matter how tired we were, we tried to make it work. We knew the window was short.
To survive, we relied on “conditional yeses”:
- “Yes, as soon as I finish this.”
- “Yes, the second your room is clean.”
The point was that a yes was always in there somewhere. Okay, most of the time.
The teen version is trickier.
Suddenly you’re not managing a bedtime. You’re making decisions that help shape a human being.
To be clear, there are certainly times when no means no. But we’ve realized that saying no to a teenager often works better as a pivot than a brick wall.
No, you can’t go to that unsupervised party. Yes, you can invite your friends here, and I’ll order pizza.
No, I’m not just buying you that. Yes, let’s figure out how you can earn it.
No, you can’t quit just because it’s hard. Yes, I’ll help you practice so you can get through it.
As our kids get older, we shouldn’t be afraid to say no because sometimes the most loving answer isn’t a hard stop.
It’s a redirect.
A no that points them toward a better yes. And occasionally, a haircut that looks a little less like an alpaca.
Thanks for reading, dads.
Let’s make this time count!
